Murphy's Bus Laws

• If it's raining, cold, or both, the bus will be late.
• If you're running late, the bus will be too.
• If you think you have lots of time before your bus, you've read the timetable wrong.
• Corollary: If you read the timetable correctly, it's outdated.
• If you're early, the bus is late.
• Corollary: If you're late, the bus was early.
• The other people at the bus stop are waiting for the bus that has just pulled in.
• If you have no change, the bus driver won't have any.
• The customer can be thrown off the bus at anytime, without any explanation.
• Two buses for the same place will always pull together.
• The sign at the front of the bus is merely for decoration. It is not a bus destination.
• Waiting for a bus is longer than the journey. Sent by Pradeep S.
• If two or more bus routes go to one stop, at least one of each of the others will arrive before the one you want. Sent by Rene Chenier.
• The bus you plan to take always leaves five minutes before you reach the bus stop. The bus you take is always ten minutes late. Sent by what'd ya say?
• The hotter it is outside, the greater the chance that there is no air conditioning. Sent by The Sorokman.
• The first bus from your route will always appear in the opposite direction. Sent by The Sorokman.
• If you catch the last bus of the day, it leaves two minutes earlier. Sent by The Sorokman.
• The more times you ask the driver to tell you when to get off the bus, the greater the chance he won't. Sent by The Sorokman.
• You've been waiting for the bus for a long time, so you light a cigarette, and then here comes the bus. Sent by Arthur Caldwell.
• If you light a cigarette, the bus will come. Sent by Karacourt@aol.com.
• Comment: It also applies to taxis. Comment by Elias Stroulias.
• If you light a cigarette to hurry the bus's arrival, it will be late. Sent by Yehuda Dodo.
• Chat with a pretty girl, or light a cigarette, and the bus will arrive immediately. Sent by Francoboom.
• The bus schedule should be known as one of the most exquisitely creative and vividly imaginary forms of fiction ever devised by man. Sent by Francoboom.
• If you are early, the bus will be late.
• Corollary: If you are late, the bus will be on time. Sent by Lonnie McLaughlin.
• If you are late to the bus station, the bus will be on time. sent by Henk
• If you must take a bus, there's a strike. Sent by dizzy@campus.ie
• Irrespective of time and route, the city buses are always crowded.
• Corollary: Buses traveling in exactly opposite directions go empty. Sent by Swaminathan P.
• The last person on the bus always wants the previous stop. Sent by pjwmail@ntlworld.com
• When you're behind time, you always get every learner driver in front of you, and every light is red. Sent by pjwmail@ntlworld.com
• No one has the correct change. Sent by pjwmail@ntlworld.com
• Every dork wants a stupid conversation and won't get off the bus. Sent by pjwmail@ntlworld.com
• When walking to a bus stop, if you look back to see if the bus is coming, it won't. If you don't look back, the bus will pass you as you reach the bus stop. Sent by Edson
• Crystal's Law - If you wait for a long bus and decide to leave the station, the bus will arrive just as you're too far away to catch it. Sent by DaeDream28@aol.com
• No matter who you sit next to, they will start a cell phone conversation about their Boyfriend or Mothers hospital operation. Sent by Anthony Sullivan