Murphy's Cars Laws

Murphy's Cars Laws

  • Being dead right doesn't make you any less dead. Sent by Natalie.
  • The largest vehicle always has the right of way. Sent by Natalie.
  • You're only pulled over when you were just trying to make the light. Sent by Natalie.
  • When there are three other cars on the road, the drivers are drunk, and there's not a cop in sight. Sent by Natalie.
  • Hotrods are never seen, but often heard. Sent by Natalie.
  • You finally save up enough to fix your car and get fired. Sent by Natalie.
  • The car only breaks at the least convenient time. When your car breaks down and it is a small repair, the mechanic has to remove the engine to get to that part. Sent by Natalie.
  • No matter how well-kept the car is, an oil leak will develop. Sent by Natalie.
  • When you take your car to a mechanic because it makes a funny sound, you cannot demonstrate it to the mechanic or describe it. Sent by Natalie.
  • Washing your car constitutes a rain dance to the raining gods. Sent by Natalie.
  • Corollary: washing a car to make it rain will cause a drought. Sent by Darren
  • There's always a parking space when driving a 4X4. Sent by Hein Traag
  • If you're working under a car's hood and dropping something, it will always roll to the middle of the car and just out of reach. Sent by Butch
  • Corollary: Unless there is a floor drain. Sent by David G. Showers
  • The temperature of vinyl seat covers is inversely proportional to the length of your skirt or shorts. Sent by Frepp
  • The cleaner the windscreen, the stronger the magnetism to insects.
  • Corollary: A huge insect will splotch on your windscreen within one minute after you exit the carwash. Sent by Zain
  • When you waive the extra insurance, your rental car will be vandalized. Sent byFloris Kleijne. Sender comment: They may not be Murphy's most eloquent laws, but they happened in Ireland earlier this year.
  • After your rental car has been vandalized, the replacement will probably be broken into on the same day. Sent byFloris Kleijne. Sender comment: They may not be Murphy's most eloquent laws, but they happened in Ireland earlier this year.
  • Car dealers always create a great payment plan for the car they know you need but can't afford. Sent by Skwirl
  • Your car keys are always in the pocket of the hand that is fullest. Sent by Stan NZ
  • Your child will fall asleep in the car 5 minutes before you reach your destination.
  • A flat will occur during the heaviest downpour after dark.
  • Corollary: On the side of the car closest to the traffic speeding past. Sent by David Poole
  • The later you run, the greater the chance of hitting every red light in your path. Sent by Marisa Booth
  • The later you run, the slower the people in front of you and on any accessible side will drive. Sent by Marisa Booth
  • The less you want to be somewhere, the more likely every light will be green and traffic will be clear. Sent by Marisa Booth
  • If you're stuck in a traffic jam and move to the fast lane, it will become the slowest; if you move back, that lane will stand still. Sent by Or Gadish
  • A flat will occur when you are without a spare. This will happen after your significant other has reminded you to get one. They will be in the car. Sent by Sanchay
  • A flat won't occur while you have a spare wheel. Sent by Sanchay
  • A car will always travel behind you when you want to slow down. Sent by Robert Van Sile
  • A semi-truck will be in each lane whenever you are late on the highway to slow down traffic. Sent by Frank (a.k.a. The Xception)
  • If you are late and stuck in the right-hand lane behind a bus, the bus will stop at every stop. Sent by Frank (a.k.a. The Xception)
  • Corollary: It will be a school bus that will make frequent and sudden stops. Sent by Frank (a.k.a. The Xception)