Murphy's Photography Laws

Corollary: Strobes only work when there is nobody else to see. Sent by Jason Antman.

Strobes only explode when lots of people are watching. Sent by Jason Antman.

The success of an assignment is inversely proportional to the product of its importance and the number of people watching. Sent by Jason Antman.

A photographer's excitement increases the chance of fogging film, scratching prints, and deleting files. Sent by Jason Antman.

Safelights - aren't. Sent by Jason Antman.

Corollary: When exposing the once-in-a-lifetime shot. Sent by Jason Antman.

No matter how long you've had a convention for marking film holders, you will forget it. Sent by Jason Antman.

Corollary: The more expensive the lens, the greater the attraction. Sent by Jason Antman.

Lenses are attracted back to their source - hard rocks. Sent by Jason Antman.

When the level of anticipation is highest, this sensor causes the back to flip open, exposing the film. Sent by Takura Razemba.

Cameras are designed with a built-in sensor that senses the anticipation to develop the film.

When you shoot the night away and never have to stop, your film does not roll on to the take-up reel. Sent by Les Benton.

Your batteries will always die during a long exposure with the shutter open.

Your batteries will always go dead, or you will have to put in a new film canister at the most inopportune moment.

Bugs always want to land on the mirror during a lens swap.

When you drop a lens cap, the inside part always lands face down in the mud.

The lens that falls is always the most expensive.

The self-importance of a client is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy, as is his deviousness and mischievousness.

Photo experience is something you never get until just after you need it.

A clean and dry camera is a magnet for dust, mud, and moisture.

Flashes will fail as soon as you need them.

Corollary: The simple things are always difficult.

The important things are always simple.

There is no such thing as a perfect shot.

Client Intelligence is a contradiction.