Murphy's Real Estate Laws

Proper disposal of chewing gum is on the carpet.

If it is raining, you can be sure the windows are open at one or more of your units.

If you have any questions about anything, ask your tenants.

Your tenant will try to flush it down the toilet if it exists.

When a tenant calls and says, "Hi, how are you?" Something is drastically wrong.

Tenants swear under oath that the window was broken when moving in.

The insurance inspector always shows up to take photos of the building as you are putting the evicted tenant’s possessions on the curb.

Everything in your rentals will break 100 times faster than in your home.

Your best tenants always get job transfers during the worst rental markets.

A tenant's ability to see dirt and damage is much greater when they move in than when they move out.

The hardware store closes five minutes before you get there.

Every lost pet will find its way to your rental.

At least one tenant's check will be "lost in the mail" monthly

When a furnace breaks in mid-winter, it is always the heat exchanger.

Tenants only lock up in the middle of the night, or on Christmas.

Prospective tenants who make an appointment to see your rental across town often get kidnapped there, so there was no way they could call you.

If a tenant attempts to replace the washer in a faucet, plan on replacing the faucet, perhaps all the plumbing in the building.

Tenants have at least one relative get sick or die per month, so they will just have to pay you later.

That sweet little girl with the baby you rented to will start dating the mad motorcycle man from hell and several of his friends the very next week.